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ultimate jokes n quotes
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Author ultimate jokes n quotes
suppressemotion
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Joined: 21 Oct 2010
Posts: 293

Post: #1   PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 11:28 am    Post subject: ultimate jokes n quotes Reply with quote

Sardar Ji's Wife: You tell a man something, it goes in one ear & comes out of the other.

Sardar Ji: You tell a woman something, it goes in both ears & comes out of the mouth. 24 24
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suppressemotion
White Belt
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Joined: 21 Oct 2010
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Post: #2   PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 11:30 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

First Sardar Ji: What are the fastest means of communication ?

Second Sardar Ji: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman

Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE. 24 24
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suppressemotion
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Post: #3   PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 11:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Father writes on son's facebook wall:

'Hi son, how are you? Me and your mom miss you,
so please switch off your computer and come downstairs to eat dinner!' 24 24 Shocked
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Post: #4   PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 11:32 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Another good joke: osama bin laden is dead! 24 2guns
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Post: #5   PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 11:32 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Santa walks into a library & says, “Can I have a burger and coke?”
Librarian, “I’m sorry, this is a library.
” Santa whispers, “Can I have a burger & coke?” 24 24
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suppressemotion
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Post: #6   PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 11:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Q. WHY AMERICANS STOP PRINTING STAMPS WITH PHOTO OF PAMEELA ANDERSON?

A. COZ PEOPLE STARTED LICKING THE WRONG SIDE OF IT FOR PASTING THEM ON THE ENVELOPES. 24 24
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suppressemotion
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Post: #7   PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 11:35 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

GLOW IN THE DARK

I really, deeply wish tat u r here wif me in my room, on my bed & lights is off & we get under the cover together.. 2 show u my.. new watch tat glow in the dark AEOM AEOM
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shekharinvest
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Post: #8   PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 12:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

suppressemotion wrote:
Q. WHY AMERICANS STOP PRINTING STAMPS WITH PHOTO OF PAMEELA ANDERSON?

A. COZ PEOPLE STARTED LICKING THE WRONG SIDE OF IT FOR PASTING THEM ON THE ENVELOPES. 24 24


Good one !


suppressemotion seems to be in a hurry to get his black belt
24 24 24
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Post: #9   PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 2:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

1)Height Of Trouble..

When Your Girlfriend Has Found Out About Your Fiancee..
.
.
.

.
.
.
.

Now They R Both On Their Way To Your House To Tell Your Wife =P Shocked AEOM
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Post: #10   PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 2:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

A conversation before marriage...
He : Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
She : Do you want me to leave?
He : No! Don't even think about it.
She : Do you love me?
He : Of course! Over and over!
She : Have you ever cheated on me?
He : No! Why are you even asking?
She : Will you kiss me?
He : Every chance I get.
She : Will you hit me?
He : Are you crazy! I'm not that kind of person!
She : Can I trust you?
He : Yes.
She : Darling!
To read a conversation after marriage, simply read this in reverse...
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suppressemotion
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Post: #11   PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 8:39 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

So Prince William arrived in a Bentley, and left in a horse-drawn carriage. Guess, that`s what a marriage does to a man! 24 groupwave1
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Post: #12   PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 8:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Santa goes for selection in the Indian Navy.
Captain: So u hv come for Navy selection, do u know how to swim?
Santa: If I go for Air Force selection, should I know how 2 fly? 24 24 24
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Post: #13   PostPosted: Thu May 05, 2011 8:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

"I wasn't satisfied just to earn a good living. I was looking
to make a statement."



Beyond The Quote
If you’re going to be truly successful, then set yourself apart from everyone else. Go beyond the limits of what classifies the average
person and be exceptional.
AEOM
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Post: #14   PostPosted: Thu May 05, 2011 9:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wife: Look at that man who has drunk a lot..

Husband: Who is he?

Wife: 10 year ago, he was my boy friend and i denied him for marriage.

Husband: Oh my god, he is still celebrating!! 24 24
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Post: #15   PostPosted: Thu May 05, 2011 12:05 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

What is the extreme limit of stupidity?
Santa and Banta sitting in a rickshaw & fighting for window seat. 24 24 groupwave1
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